Friday, 8 January 2016

The Most Difficult Day of My Life

Today was the day we said gooodbye to my youngest son Nicholas. As I expected the chapel was full, many of Nicks friends had travelled, one right from Cornwall, and workmates who were on nights stayed up to be with us.

Thankfully it was a sunny day, although very cold.

Nicks son K, and my oldest son took the first two places carrying the coffin in.

DB made a splendid job of reading what I had written, just the right amount of joy and pathos, it helped so much to lift the atmosphere.

Both Nicks elder and younger daughters spoke about their dad, poor M could hardly say what she wanted to for tears. My youngest daughter had to leave the service just as the curtains came round, I knew she was not well when we picked her up, it all got too much, so her cousin and her husband took her home, so DB and I could stay for a while.

We went to the reception, stayed for a while catching up with various people and then decided to make our way home. We now have closure, I just have to accept that we will no longer see him. 

Life will never be the same again, but he will live on forever in our hearts. Life goes on and I must go on with it.

21 comments:

  1. So glad everything went smoothly. Sounds like it was a lovely send off for Nicholas. Look after yourself. Love, Helen x

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  2. What can I say? You are all in my thoughts and prayers.

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  3. Sounded a very dignified and personal service for your son. I hope you felt comforted by all the words you heard today. Catriona

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  4. I thought of you when I woke up today and am so thankful that you had a quiet peaceful day and that DB was well enough to attend with you.

    Very sorry to hear your youngest daughter illness.

    Take care. Sandy

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  5. Dear friend, I am so glad to hear that Nick's service was all it needed to be and that your written words were well received. You and your family were in my prayers when I woke up during the night and several more times this morning.

    Peace be with you.

    Hugs

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  6. Nothing I can say to make any of this any better. Just know that you continue to be in my thoughts & prayers. Take care of yourself.
    Hugs,
    Leslie in SD, USA

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  7. Your son can rest knowing he was given a dignified respectful send-off surrounded by friends and family. With thoughts, Floss x

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  9. So difficult for you all I know, but thankfully everything apparently went well and in a dignified way. I hope you are now able to relax a bit and accept the reality of your loss, and as you said, have closure. Grieving is stressful for you and all those left behind. I know Nicholas would not want that part of the process following a death to impact you to the point of being ill yourself. So my dear Anne, please take care of you and know we all wish you kinder days ahead.
    Love, and sending a big hug - Mary

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  10. I kept you in my thoughts all day today and I am so glad to hear that in the circumstances it went well.

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  11. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Take care.

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  12. I sat doing some sewing this afternoon and thought about you and wondered how it was all going, it says a lot about Nick that people were prepared to travel long distances to pay their respects - he was a good lad, you've mentioned him so many times over the years that I've been reading your blog - my old Nan used to say the Good Lord only takes the best and it's true - Hugs again from me Anne xxx

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  13. May he rest in peace. Be kind to yourselves as you begin to try to come to terms with your bereavement.

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  14. So glad that his friends were there to support you - praying that they continue to be there for you in the days ahead x

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  15. Sending hugs and hoping that you can find some peaceful days ahead. I know it must be so very hard.
    I am glad that today went as well as it could under the circumstances. Very nice that people traveled so far, your son was well loved.
    You often mentioned him on your blog and all the useful jobs he did for you.
    Take care of yourselves.
    Pam in TX.xx

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  16. Oh Anne, I'm so sorry to hear your sad news. Keeping you in my thoughts.

    Ali xxx

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  17. I am so pleased that the day went as well as it could, and that DB was able to read your uplifting tribute. I hope as time passes you find a peaceful place and can let in all your happy memories of Nick. Xx

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  18. So glad to hear the funeral went as well as possible. Your life has changed for ever and it will never be the same. The pain never goes away but you will learn to accept your loss and the sadness will become more bearable. I do speak from the experience of having lost a daughter and a granddaughter. Two separate occasions both to drunk drivers. I'll be thinking of you in the days ahead.

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  19. I am so sorry for your loss. What a great blessing our children are to our lives. As you say, you will no longer see him (except perhaps in dreams), but he will be with you in your heart. I am relieved for you that DB was able to read the eulogy and that you made it through the day in honor of your beloved child. Be kind to yourself. I send you hopes for peace and heart's ease.

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  20. You are one very brave and loving mum. You are in my thoughts and prayers and I send you love and hugs. Wanda

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